作夢者班/做夢者班 II

本論壇自 2009 起分享南開諾布仁波切之教法,目前歸屬於象雄文化。Email: dreamworkforum@gmail.com

唐望故事—做夢篇 REVIEW

Being-in-Dreaming、The Wheel of Time、The Art of Dreaming 等書札記、摘譯與翻譯;個人夢修心得整理。

「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-41

文章SW » 2023-09-16, 16:35

最近不知道哪裡聽到,在一處樹的凹處裡,找到一個入定上百年的修行人,他一出定就問起自己家人,不過朝代、時代都已經變了。另外一個普巴扎西仁波切常講的故事:一個牧童有天遇到山洞中修行的密樂日巴,也想學他那樣禪修。密勒日巴見他頗有善根就教他打坐,這牧童一坐就是七天,直到家人鄰居在一處山洞中找到他,他一出定就問到他的牛呢?是不是該回家了?完全不知道已經過了七天之久。

這意思是說即便是肉體也可以暫停飲食的意願。而這裡所講的做夢體沒有飲食的意願,是指當把做夢體當成日常世界的幻身在生活時,他沒辦法吃下實質的食物,因為做夢體的本質是能量體,純能量而已。這完全是針對在日常生活中而言的,做夢做夢體依然可以體驗飲食的感覺,因為是意生身,也就是心結合五感官功能:色聲香味觸都可以感受到。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-41

「天啊!我們是在回憶起『另一個自己』(the other self,指分身)!」她驚呼道,聲音近乎歇斯底里。然後她平靜下來,以緩和的聲音繼續說,「顯然我們已經去過那裡,而回憶起它的唯一方法就是我們正在做的,在共同做夢時射出我們的做夢體。」

「『射出我們的做夢體』是什麼意思?」我問。

「你親眼目睹過哲那羅射出他的做夢體,」她說,「它就像一顆慢速子彈砰地一聲出來;實際上,它從身體上脫開或黏住時,會伴隨一聲巨響。

「Nagual告訴我,哲那羅的做夢體能夠做我們平常大部分的事情。他過去常以這種方式來找你,以便震動你。我現在知道Nagual和哲那羅想要什麼了。他們要你去回憶起這點,為了達到這個效果,哲那羅常常射出他的做夢體,在你眼前表演不可思議的行動,但無濟於事。」

「我從來不知道他是處於做夢體中。」我說。

「你從來不知道是因為你沒有在看,」她說,「哲那羅試圖藉由做那些做夢體無法做的事情來讓你知道,比如吃、喝等等。Nagual告訴我,哲那羅曾經和你開玩笑說他要去拉屎而讓群山震動。」

「為什麼做夢體無法做那些事情呢?」我問。

「因為做夢體無法處理吃或喝的意願。」她回答。

「拉葛達,妳這是什麼意思?」我問。

「哲那羅的偉大成就在於,他在做夢中學會了身體的意願,」她解釋,「他完成了你已經開始做的事情。他可以竭盡可能地完美夢出他整個身體。

「但是做夢體的意願與肉體的意願不同。例如,做夢體可以穿過牆壁,因為它知道消失於空氣中的意願。而肉體知道飲食的意願,但不知道消失的意願。對哲那羅的肉體來說,要穿過一道牆就像要他的做夢體吃東西一樣不可能。」

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 174-175 重譯


"Holy Jesus! We are remembering the other self!" she exclaimed, her voice almost bordering on hysteria. Then she calmed down and went on talking in a subdued tone. "Evidently we've already been there and the only way of remembering it is the way we're doing it, by shooting off our dreaming bodies while dreaming together."

"What do you mean, shooting off our dreaming bodies?" I asked.

"You yourself have witnessed when Genaro used to shoot off his dreaming body," she said. "It pops off like a slow bullet. It actually glues and unglues itself from the physical body with a loud crack.

"The Nagual told me that Genaro's dreaming body could do most of the things we normally do. He used to come to you that way in order to jolt you. I know now what the Nagual and Genaro were after. They wanted you to remember, and for that effect Genaro used to perform incredible feats in front of your very eyes by shooting off his dreaming body. But to no avail."

"I never knew that he was in his dreaming body," I said.

"You never knew because you weren't watching," she said. "Genaro tried to let you know by attempting to do things that the dreaming body cannot do, like eating, drinking, and so forth. The Nagual told me that Genaro used to joke with you that he was going to shit and make the mountains tremble."

"Why can't the dreaming body do those things?" I asked.

"Because the dreaming body cannot handle the intent of eating, or drinking," she replied.

"What do you mean by that, Gordar" I asked.

"Genaro's great accomplishment was that in his dreaming he learned the intent of the body," she explained. "He finished what you had started to do. He could dream his whole body as perfectly as it could be.

"But the dreaming body has a different intent from the intent of the physical body. For instance, the dreaming body can go through a wall, because it knows the intent of disappearing into thin air. The physical body knows the intent of eating, but not the one of disappearing. For Genaro's physical body to go through a wall would be as impossible as for his dreaming body to eat."
SW
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文章: 4411
註冊時間: 2012-03-05, 16:23
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-42

文章SW » 2023-09-30, 18:36

這集有點意思,講到夢中跟共同做夢的伙伴說話的情況。其中一點是自己聲音很奇怪。這種情況應該有多種,有時候會悶住說不大出來聲音,或聲音很殘破。另外一個卡氏說到見到一起共同做夢的拉葛達完完全全就是她本人的樣子。

我出體夢如影隨行一位我稱為 Partner 的情形很多年囉,可是你現在要我描述或心中想著他的形象,我真的想不出來,因為每次都不一樣。聲音也是完全沒有記憶,只是每次在夢中,有時覺得有台灣腔,或者有什麼腔,同樣沒有記憶點,回想不起來聲音長什麼樣子。

這點很奇特,如果你見過一個人一百次,那你一定很容易想起他的樣子,但是我對 Partner 完全沒有記憶上的特定形象。如此,我就不知道以他的視角,他怎麼看待我的,我是如卡氏所描述的:完完全全就是我的樣子嗎?我覺得不一定,因為意生身是能量體,能量體怎麼被詮釋,屬於見者這一邊的事情。

就好像賽斯書當中也有探討共同夢的議題,每個參與的人,對於夢場景內的東西詮釋成什麼,都屬於個人部分,並非共同。就算佛法中說人類有共業,所以聚合點都會把環境觀成同樣的,這裡有點不一樣,這裡是說到夢境,夢境是能量的再詮釋,跟共業(聚合點同樣位置)比較沒關係。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-42

我們對於做夢的討論對我們來說是最有幫助的,因為它不僅解決了我們「共同做夢」上的困境,也將我們做夢的概念帶至心智的層次(intellectual level)。

我們達成共識:是再試試「共同做夢」的時候了。

我很容易就進入第一個狀態:「靜態守夜」。我身體上有一種愉悅的覺受,從我太陽神經叢(solar plexus,胃輪)散發出的刺痛感。

突然間,我發現自己與拉葛達面對面,就好像我拐過一個轉角就碰上她了。我全神沉浸於看著她:她是如此真實,絕對是她本人。

拉葛達趕緊試著交叉我們的手臂,我們環顧四周。我們眼前沒有固定的畫面;沒有任何類型的靜態影像。我靈機一動,告訴拉葛達,說正是因為我們一直看著對方,所以才錯過做夢場景的出現。話一出口,我才意識到我們處於一種新的情況中。我的聲音嚇到我,那是一種奇怪的聲音,尖銳刺耳。

拉葛達回答說我們沒有錯過什麼,而是我們的第二注意力被其他事物吸引住了。她微笑著,嘟了嘟嘴,對自己的聲音感到既驚訝又困擾。

我發現在做夢中談話的新奇感很神奇,因為我們不是夢到我們在說話,而是確實在交談。這需要一種獨特的努力,很像我最初在做夢中走下樓梯的努力。

我突然意識到,拉葛達和我已經完全自發進入了我們的做夢體中了。

因為我在這種狀態下有過一些移動的經驗,所以我以意志力使自己去到拉葛達身邊。我想要擁抱她,但是我移動得太靠近她,以致於我們融合在一起。我能感覺自己是個獨立的個體,但同時也感覺自己是拉葛達的一部分。我非常喜歡這種感覺。

我們一直保持融合狀態,直到有什麼東西打破了我們。我感覺到一個命令說要去觀察環境。

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 181-183 重譯

Our discussion of dreaming was most helpful to us, not only because it solved our impasse in dreaming together, but because it brought its concepts to an intellectual level.

In unison, we arrived then at the conclusion that it was time to try again our dreaming together.

I very easily entered into the first state, restful vigil. I had a sensation of bodily pleasure; a tingling radiating from my solar plexus.

suddenly I found myself face to face with la Gorda. It was as if I had turned a corner and bumped into her. I became immersed in watching her. She was so absolutely real, so herself.

La Gorda quickly tried to interlock our arms. We looked around. There was no fixed tableau in front of our eyes; no static picture of any sort. I had a sudden insight and told la Gorda that it was because we had been watching each other that we had missed the appearance of the dreaming scene. Only after I had spoken did I realize that we were in a new situation. The sound of my voice scared me. It was a strange voice; harsh; unappealing.

La Gorda replied that we had not missed anything, that our second attention had been caught by something else. She smiled and made a puckering gesture with her mouth; a mixture of surprise and annoyance at the sound of her own voice.

I found the novelty of talking in dreaming spellbinding, for we were not dreaming of a scene in which we talked, we were actually conversing. It required a unique effort quite similar to my initial effort of walking down a stairway in dreaming.

The realization struck me then that la Gorda and I had quite spontaneously entered into our dreaming bodies.

Because I had some experience with moving in that state, I willed myself to go to la Gorda's side. My desire was to embrace her, but instead I moved in on her so close that we merged. I was aware of myself as an individual being, but at the same time I felt I was part of la Gorda. I liked that feeling immensely.

We stayed merged until something broke our hold. I felt a command to examine the environment.
SW
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-43

文章SW » 2023-10-28, 16:29

魯宓在翻譯這些段落時,用的是右邊意識,以及左邊意識,但原文並沒有意識兩字。我也認為使用意識會落入心識(凡夫識)範疇內;而左邊,這裡所講到的已經是單純的覺,而非識,這在藏文是兩個字:rig pa(or rig,覺) 和 rnam shes(識)。

近日看到(聽到)曲迦仁波切的微信貼文,講到 rig pa 和 rang rig 兩同義詞,查字典分別是:

rig pa:knower; knowledge; awareness; know; be aware; aware; basic knowledge
rang rig:self-knower; self-knowing; self-cognizing consciousness

這都是一種直觀的自知自覺,很符合以下所提到的「左邊」:一種沒有受到心識(心的分析判斷)的干擾,很節約或節制(econamy,這裡可能是節省能量)、很高速的本俱(inherent)的能力。

這個節制,秋竹法王也常提到要克制,我們要克制的就是右邊的習性造成的不必要的能量損耗。印第安托爾特克傳承不講究那麼多戲論的情勒(知母念恩報恩發慈悲心等等),之所以要轉至左邊,一切都是為了實際操作的理由。

最近在翻譯出版一本死亡後中陰過程引導的書,附錄中提到一句:

身體變得如同土石般了無生氣,而氣息消散於空中。清淨的覺性如火星般往上飛升[1]……
[1] 這意味神識離開身體。對普通人來說,死後不久便會發生,而行者的神識可能會在「圖當」中(thugs dam)維持一段長短不定的時間,於此期間,其神識還停留在身體內。此處文本說的是覺性(rig pa,本覺)而不是意識(rnam shes),因為這些引導係針對修行者。

熟悉唐望故事的人,一定讀過唐望描述目睹自己兒子死亡時的過程。他轉換到左邊,目睹自己兒子的神識像火星般往上飛升。所以可見得唐望這支傳承在某些方面,確實與大圓滿的論述有驚人的相似處!


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-43

唐望告訴我們,人類(人體)分為兩部分:右邊,他稱之為tonal,涵蓋了理智所能設想到的一切;而左邊,稱為nagual,是一個無法描述的領域、無法用言語含攝的領域。如果理解是與整個身體一起發生的,那麼左邊也許可以被理解,因此它是排斥被概念化的。

唐望也告訴我們,所有巫術的功用、可能性及成就,從最簡單到最驚人的,都在人體本身。

拉葛達認為,Nagual望‧馬特斯的努力,是去引導我們藉由做夢對第二注意力的自我控制,到達另一邊的自我(the other self)。

然而,他透過身體上的操縱,讓我們直接接觸到第二注意力。拉葛達記得他常常以推或按她的背,強迫她從一邊轉到另一邊。她說,有時他甚至會在她的右肩胛骨上或周圍猛敲一記。

結果使她進入一種異常清晰的狀態。對拉葛達來說,似乎在那種狀態下一切都變快了,但世界卻沒有改變。

我記得我也遇過同樣的情況。時不時,唐望都可能在我背上來上一拳。我總是覺得他打在我的脊椎上,高度在肩胛骨之間。隨之而來的是超常的明晰(clarity,明性)。世界還是一樣,但更銳利些。可能是我的推理能力被唐望的一擊所麻木,從而讓我能夠在沒有它們的干預下感知。

這些強化意識(heightened awareness)狀態的另一個特徵,是個人互動中無比的豐富性,這種豐富性被我們的身體理解為一種加速感(sensation of speeding)。我們在左右兩邊之間的來回移動,使我們更容易瞭解到:在右邊時,有太多的能量與時間被消耗在我們日常生活的行為和互動中;而另一方面,在左邊時,則有對節制(economy)和速度的本俱需求(inherent need)。

拉葛達無法描述這種速度到底是什麼,我也不行。我最多只能說,在左邊時,我可以精確而直接地掌握事物的含義。行動的任何方面都不用事先準備或引入。

我行動,然後休息;我向前,然後撤退,沒有任何我慣常的思考過程。這就是拉葛達與我所理解的速度。

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 198-195 重譯

Don Juan had told us that human beings are divided in two. The right side, which he called the tonal, encompasses everything the intellect can conceive of. The left side, called the nagual, is a realm of indescribable features; a realm impossible to contain in words. The left side is perhaps comprehended, if comprehension is what takes place, with the total body; thus its resistance to conceptualization.

Don Juan had also told us that all the faculties, possibilities, and accomplishments of sorcery, from the simplest to the most astounding, are in the human body itself.

La Gorda thought that the Nagual Juan Matus's efforts were to lead us to the other self by means of our self-control of the second attention through dreaming.

However, he put us in direct touch with the second attention through bodily manipulation. La Gorda remembered that he used to force her to go from one side to the other by pushing or massaging her back. She said that sometimes he would even give her a sound blow over or around her right shoulder blade.

The result was her entrance into an extraordinary state of clarity. To la Gorda, it seemed that everything in that state went faster, yet nothing in the world had been changed.

I remembered the same had been the case with me. At any given time, don Juan might give me a blow on my back. I always felt the blow on my spine, high between my shoulder blades. An extraordinary clarity would follow. The world was the same but sharper. It may have been that my reasoning faculties were numbed by don Juan's blow, thus allowing me to perceive without their intervention.

Another feature of those states of heightened awareness was the incomparable richness of personal interaction; a richness that our bodies understood as a sensation of speeding. Our back and forth movement between the right and the left sides made it easier for us to realize that on the right side too much energy and time is consumed in the actions and interactions of our daily life. On the left side, on the other hand, there is an inherent need for economy and speed.

La Gorda could not describe what this speed really was, and neither could I. The best I could do would be to say that on the left side I could grasp the meaning of things with precision and directness. Every facet of activity was free of preliminaries or introductions.

I acted and rested. I went forth and retreated without any of the thought processes that are usual to me. This was what la Gorda and I understood as speeding.
SW
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文章: 4411
註冊時間: 2012-03-05, 16:23
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-44

文章SW » 2023-11-12, 15:21

這篇跟死亡有關,當然也可以說跟死亡無關,因為不再有死亡了:唐望傳承巫士在離開這個人世前,點亮明晰繭(能量體)內每個位置,身體化為一團火焰,而保有自己獨一的意識(覺性)。這就是托爾特克版的虹光身。

這點出本書的書名「老鷹的贈予」,這個巨鷹所指為何,不是重點;重點是他們一脈相傳下來一套「規矩」,聽起來就像是「解脫引導規範」。這套「解脫引導」與目前正要出版的「中陰引導」異曲同工,指的就是在中陰時解脫的引導。

這兩者不約而同的都使用一個英文詞,叫 passageway。有校稿師兄希望我換個翻譯詞,不要稱為「通道」,但基本上明明就是一條通道,它有明確的入口(entrance)。大家可以往前複習《出生、生命與死亡》之死亡篇的翻譯,最後提到的幾個入口時刻。

另外有個詞 knowledge,第三段巫士版虹光身講到「整個身體都被知識所點燃」。這個 knowledge 大陸同修喜歡翻譯成「經驗」,這幾年好一些,改翻「知識經驗」;同修會體系外的則翻成「智慧」。其實它指的就是「所知障」的「所知」,沒有所知障了,當然就「知」了(knowledge 的字根就是 know),那就是知識。上述即將出版的「中陰引導」一書,兩個根本文,一再提到認知、認出、認識:

藏文 shes:
cognition; knowledge
to be aware of, come to understand, to know, to grasp, master, to learn, to realize, wisdom

這麼多解釋裡面就是沒有經驗二字。

所以手邊有《夢瑜伽與自然光的修習》,經驗都要換算成知識;另外通道也被取代掉了,原文應該翻成:

1. 睡著之後存在一條通道(passage)——一段過渡時期,時間可長可短——直到開始作夢。(p. 74)
2. 有覺知狀態的出現,而心尚未開始進入例如思考這樣的運作,就是這個通道,我們透過它進入所謂的自然光狀態,一般總認為密續修行者就是在這段時間證悟自身。(p. 76)
3. 在你通過或經過(這個通道)的時候,會開展出一系列的光,對這些光有很多種解釋。(p. 76)

註:南開師口語上喜歡講 passage,但義大利象雄出版品則改成更合意的英文 passageway。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-44

唐望解釋說,〔巨鷹的〕這個規矩不是故事,而跨越到自由並非意指永恆的生命,如通常所理解的永恆,亦即永生不死。

規矩中所陳述的是,一個人可以保持在臨終時刻通常會失去的覺知(awareness)。

唐望無法解釋保持這個覺知是什麼意思,或者可能他甚至無法想像它。他的恩人曾告訴他,在跨越〔到另一邊〕的那一刻,一個人便進入了第三注意力,而整個身體都被知識(knowledge)所點燃。每一個細胞立刻覺知到自己,也覺知到了身體的完整性(totality)。

他的恩人也告訴他,這種覺知(覺性)對我們分化的心智來說,是無意義的。因此,戰士奮鬥的關鍵不在於去瞭解規矩中所說的跨越意指跨越到第三注意力,而毋寧是去想像確實存在這樣的覺知(覺性)。

唐望說,一開始,規矩對他來說是純屬言語的範疇。他無法想像它如何落入現實世界的領域以及其方式。

然而,在他恩人的有效指導下,經過了大量的努力從事,他終於成功掌握了這個規矩的真正本質,並完全接受它作為一套實用的指令,而不是一個神話。從此,他在處理第三注意力的現實(reality)方面就沒有任何問題了。

他於道上所遇到的唯一障礙,來自於他如此徹底地相信規矩是一張地圖,他相信他必須在世界上尋找一個真正的開口(opening),一條通道(passageway)。基於此故,他不必要地困在戰士發展的第一階段。

結果就是,唐望身為領導者與老師的工作是去幫助門徒們,尤其是我,避免重蹈他的覆轍。他成功地帶領我們經歷了戰士發展的三個階段,而沒有過分強調其中任何一個階段。

首先他引導我們把規矩當作一張地圖;然後他引導我們認識到,一個人可以獲得一種至高無上的覺知,因為確有這樣的事存在;最後,他引導我們進入通往其他隱藏的覺知世界(other concealed world of awareness)的真正通道。

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 211-212,重譯

Don Juan explained that the rule was not a tale, and that to cross over to freedom did not mean eternal life as eternity is commonly understood- that is, as living forever.

What the rule stated was that one could keep the awareness which is ordinarily relinquished at the moment of dying.

Don Juan could not explain what it meant to keep that awareness, or perhaps he could not even conceive of it. His benefactor had told him that at the moment of crossing, one enters into the third attention, and the body in its entirety is kindled with knowledge. Every cell at once becomes aware of itself, and also aware of the totality of the body.

His benefactor had also told him that this kind of awareness is meaningless to our compartmentalized minds. Therefore the crux of the warrior's struggle was not so much to realize that the crossing over stated in the rule meant crossing to the third attention, but rather to conceive that there exists such an awareness at all.

Don Juan said that in the beginning the rule was to him something strictly in the realm of words. He could not imagine how it could lapse into the domain of the actual world and its ways.

Under the effective guidance of his benefactor, however, and after a great deal of work, he finally succeeded in grasping the true nature of the rule, and totally accepted it as a set of pragmatic directives rather than a myth. From then on, he had no problem in dealing with the reality of the third attention.

The only obstacle in his way arose from his being so thoroughly convinced that the rule was a map that he believed he had to look for a literal opening in the world, a passageway. Somehow he had become needlessly stuck at the first level of a warrior's development.
Don Juan's own work as a leader and teacher, as a result, was directed at helping the apprentices, and especially me, to avoid repeating his mistake. What he succeeded in doing with us was to lead us through the three stages of a warrior's development without overemphasizing any of them.

First he guided us to take the rule as a map; then he guided us to the understanding that one can attain a paramount awareness, because there is such a thing; and finally he guided us to an actual passageway into that other concealed world of awareness.
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-45

文章SW » 2023-12-02, 17:13

以下這些內容不見得與夢修有直接關係,但卻與修行相關。諸多上師的教導中經常提及那洛巴跟隨帝洛巴的故事,那洛巴(聽說是南開師的一個前世)是印度那爛陀學院的大學者,當然這就代表理性的一面,而帝洛巴的教法當然就是讓他完全拋棄理智的一面。

這裡所講的左邊和右邊的意識或覺知,左右應該不是指位置。右邊意識和左邊意識,或說覺知,姑且可以對應於南開師常說的 presence 和 instant presence,或者左邊還沒有到 instant presence,而是強化意識,具有較多的明性(clarity),我們的修行無一不是在增加明分(明性這部分)。

另外就是唐望傳承的前行也需要淨化。除了眾所周知的「生命回顧」外,這個把人吊起來減輕與地球重力接觸的淨化方法,似乎潛獵者用得比較多(見《巫士的穿越》塔夏莎是住樹屋,另唐望屬於潛獵者)。照這樣講起來,飛行時數夠長的話,不知道是否飛行員,或者機師及空姐,業力會比較輕呢?

這就來到第二條:有明分不代表已經證悟。之前札記摘過肯恩‧威爾伯的一段話:

「學生一旦清楚地瞥見這本自具足永遠存在的覺知,某些不幸的事可能會發生。一方面他們似乎解脫了身心較低層次的束縛,一方面這些較低層次的身心並沒有停止自己的需要或問題。你可以一面處於一味,一面婚姻失敗、失業或仍然是個渾球。」(《一味》pp. 218-219)

而第三段說的比較是:我們需要將所學融入自身,成為自己的知識(見解),而不是……套句普巴扎西仁波切經常說的「以理論來掩蓋自己的實修」。這什麼意思?普扎師常說弟子們動輒說自己打坐是「明空不二」,我想南開師弟子大概就是經常會把自己的狀態說成「覺觀(禪觀)狀態」或「大圓滿狀態」吧。

至於「只有少數人能夠倖存」,說明唐望傳承每期招生不是只有八或十六位學員,之前唐望幫卡氏召集的第一批八個不是全數陣亡了嗎?後來才又招三個(因為發現卡氏能量體屬於三區 Nagual 而非四區)。



「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-45


在做夢與潛獵的脅迫下,她們失去了自己的右邊——即自己的心智。因為她們的左邊的覺知異常敏銳,她們的理智很容易燒毀殆盡。一旦她們失去自己理性的一邊,她們就成為無可匹敵的做夢者與潛獵者,因為她們不再受到任何理性因素的牽制。

唐望說那些女人治癒了他的欲望。在六個月的時間裡,他大部分時間都在她們鄉村廚房天花板上懸掛的吊具中度過,就像一條正在燻製的火腿,直到他徹底淨化了想要獲得及滿足個人私欲的想法。

唐望解釋說,一套皮革吊索(leather harness)是治療某些非身體疾病的絕佳裝置。這個概念是:一個人被吊得越高,懸在半空中不接觸地面的時間越久,真正能夠淨化的效果也越好。

Under the duress of dreaming and stalking they lose their right sides, their minds. Their reason burns up easily due to the fact that their left-side awareness is extraordinarily keen. Once they lose their rational side, they are peerless dreamers and stalkers since they no longer have any rational ballast to hold them back.

Don Juan said that those women cured him of his lust. For six months he spent most of his time in a harness suspended from the ceiling of their rural kitchen, like a ham that was being smoked, until he was thoroughly purified from thoughts of gain and personal gratification.

Don Juan explained that a leather harness is a superb device for curing certain maladies that are not physical. The idea is that the higher a person is suspended and the longer that person is kept from touching the ground by dangling in midair, the better the possibilities of a true cleansing effect.


他警告我一個常見的錯誤:高估左邊的覺知;被它的明性(clarity)與力量所惑。他說,處於左邊覺知並不表示一個人立刻從自己的愚蠢中解脫——它只意味著感知能力的擴展,理解和學習的能力更強,以及最重要的,遺忘的能力更強。

He warned me about a common error; that of overestimating the left-side awareness; of becoming dazzled by its clarity and power. He said that to be in the left-side awareness does not mean that one is immediately liberated from one's folly- it only means an extended capacity for perceiving, a greater facility to understand and learn, and above all, a greater ability to forget.


唐望說,他的恩人確信這些戰士只有少數人能夠倖存下來,並且能夠重新整合自己的知識,重新引導自己的修道。唐望和他的恩人對於第二注意力的所知都是重組後的版本,一種具有內建紀律(built-in restraints)的新版本,因為它是在最嚴厲的壓迫情況下鍛煉出來的。

Don Juan said that his benefactor was convinced that only a handful of those warriors survived and were capable of reassembling their knowledge and redirecting their path. Whatever don Juan and his benefactor knew about the second attention was the restructured version; a new version which had built-in restraints because it had been forged under the harshest conditions of suppression.

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 216-217, 219,重譯
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-46

文章SW » 2023-12-16, 17:05

這部分特別相應於大圓滿教法,姑且不論什麼明晰繭或明晰蛋體,基本上在大圓滿教法裡則比喻為童瓶身(youthful vase body):我們的內在光明,猶如在一個陶瓶裡點了一盞燭燈,外在看不到其光亮。

〈基道果發願文〉當中,有句「外明心識內匿下,六特童子瓶身苞」,六特指六種特徵,苞當然就是一個外殼。這句話,有網頁解釋:

The mind radiates out, projecting outwards and then returning within
To the youthful vase body’s inner space, possessing six unique characteristics

「二取分别心向外散射,于是由外境投影而生的觉受就会被业力所染污,它最终会回归到与生俱来的明性,一种微妙的智慧状态。这个微妙的智慧在童子宝瓶身的内虚空中,并具有六种特征。」

再來講到打破蛋殼。大圓滿教法有個比喻,行者如同大鵬金翅鳥,這種鳥在蛋殼內孵化並長全,不像其他鳥類孵出後還要成長,大鵬金翅鳥一孵出來,就可以飛翔。這是其一。

其二是,大圓滿行者能夠即生證悟,是故在一生當中沒有時間能夠顯現其功德,只有等待死亡時,身心一分離,如同大鵬金翅鳥一脫離蛋殼(肉身)的桎梏,就能夠立即證悟成佛。

以上兩者都是比喻,但放到唐望一脈巫士傳承中,則有實修上的作法與意義。他們稱打破蛋殼,或讓童瓶身破裂使內外虛空融合為一,為「失去人類形象」,也就是不再有人類與生俱來的二元對立能所二取的心態,也就是不再像普通人類般看待一切事物。

還有一點,關於這個明晰繭核心的描述,南開師說的觀想是我們的顯相中央,這個中心點,也就是核心,通常我們觀想白阿明點,明點有五層顏色的光圈。這不僅是種觀想方法,在唐望這邊,亦是真正看見者所目睹的情況。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-46

對看見者來說,人類就像明晰蛋體(luminous eggs,發光的蛋),這似蛋的形狀是外部的繭;即〔內在〕光明的外殼(shell of luminosity),裡面裝著一個最奇妙懾人的核心,由諸多同心環圈(concentric circles)組成,光度偏黃,顏色同於燭焰。

唐望解釋說,在我們看來似乎很亮的蛋狀外殼其實是很黯淡的。光明(luminosity)來自明燦的核心:事實上外殼使它的輝亮變暗。唐望向我們透露,為了要讓該眾生解脫(in order to liberate that being),外殼必須被打破。它必須在正確的時間從內部打破,就像鳥類孵化完成破殼而出,如果牠們不這麼做,牠們就會窒息而亡。如同鳥類從蛋中孵化而出,在時機成熟之前,戰士是無法打破自己〔內在〕光明的外殼的。(按:光明在這裡是名詞。)

唐望告訴我們,失去人類形象是打破那個外殼的唯一手段,是讓那個懾人的明晰核心——即覺性核心——解脫的唯一方法。打破外殼意味著回憶起「另一邊自我」(the other self),並達到自我的完整。

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 255-256,重譯

human beings appear to a seer as luminous eggs, the egglike shape is an external cocoon; a shell of luminosity that houses a most intriguing, haunting, mesmeric core made up of concentric circles of yellowish luminosity the color of a candle's flame.

Don Juan explained that the egg-shaped shells which seemed so bright to us were indeed dull. The luminosity emanated from the brilliant core: The shell in fact dulled its radiance. Don Juan revealed to us that the shell must be broken in order to liberate that being. It must be broken from the inside at the right time, just as creatures that hatch out of eggs break their shells. If they fail to do so, they suffocate and die. As with creatures that hatch out of eggs, there is no way for a warrior to break the shell of his luminosity until the time is right.

Don Juan told us that losing the human form was the only means of breaking that shell, the only means of liberating that haunting luminous core; the core of awareness. To break the shell means remembering the other self, and arriving at the totality of oneself.
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-47

文章SW » 2024-01-13, 16:40

接下來是做夢者卡氏和拉葛達,接受有關潛獵的訓練,這套訓練方法是西維歐曼紐耶在做夢中得到的。這項訓練一共有三個不做,今天僅摘兩個。

這套方法是訓練做夢者直接契入第二注意力,當然我們也可以把第二注意力想成一種覺觀狀態吧。

南開師曾講過,有些修行者花五、六年閉關,坐在小箱子裡,閉關完後都不能走路:

有些低階密續的金剛乘行者有此傾向,他們修很長時間,我們去看他們時,他們修很多年睡覺的地方就是盒子而已,他們根本不睡,沒有任何床,不像我們有臥室和餐廳客廳等,他們這些行者只有小箱子,他們認為修行應該如此,這是比較低階密續犧牲的方式,大圓滿不這樣做,而是需要尊重身體。若你都不動只待在盒子裡,隔年你就不能走了,這反而製造問題,因此要和諧一切融於真實本性。(2016/06/04 幻輪瑜伽氣脈修法(2))

當然唐望巫士的訓練並非要你待在木箱裡好幾年,只是訓練做夢幾個階段當中的守夜階段:保持覺知。一位師兄告訴我,貝諾法王曾對弟子說:打坐要能夠聽到遠處山頭一根針掉到地上的聲音,做到再回來找我。不知道這是不是就是在訓練聽覺與視覺分離?

以上只是訓練「止」的修法而已,文中說到:完全黑暗和完全的寂靜,所以是一種寂靜狀態。而能察覺遠處山頭一根針或樹葉掉落的聲音,則是止修成就的驗相。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-47

西維歐‧曼紐耶打算藉由直接帶我進入第二注意力,來為我的任務做好準備。他計畫了一系列大膽的行動來激發我的意識。

對於我們的第一個「不做」,西維歐‧曼紐耶建造了一個足夠大的木製板條箱,可以容納我與拉葛達,如果我們背靠背、立起膝蓋坐著的話。板條箱有個蓋子是格子狀的,以便讓空氣可以流通。

拉葛達和我要爬進去,坐在完全黑暗和完全的寂靜中,不能睡著。他一開始就讓我們進去箱子一小段時間,然後,隨著我們熟悉了這個過程,他再增長時間,直到我們可以在裡面待上整晚而不會移動或打瞌睡。

女Nagual會陪同我們,確保我們不會因疲倦而改變意識水平。西維歐‧曼紐耶說,在不尋常的壓力情況下,我們的自然傾向是從強化意識狀態轉變為正常(日常)意識狀態,反之亦然。

每次我們執行「不做」的整體效果,是帶給我們一種無與倫比的休息感;這對我來說完全是個謎,因為我們在「守夜」期間從未入睡過。我把這種休息感歸因於我們處於一種強化意識(高度覺知的狀態),但是西維歐‧曼紐耶說,這兩者之間毫無關連;而休息的感覺是我們立起膝蓋坐著的結果。

第二項「不做」是讓我們像蜷縮的狗一樣趴在地上,幾乎是胎兒的姿勢,左側臥,額頭枕在交叉的雙臂上。西維歐‧曼紐耶堅持要我們盡可能長時間地閉上眼睛,只有當他叫我們變換姿勢改成右側臥時才睜開。

他告訴我們,這種「不做」的目的是讓我們的聽覺與視覺分離。和之前一樣,他逐漸增長時間,直到我們可以整晚都在聽覺守夜中。

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 269-270,重譯

Silvio Manuel intended to prepare me for my task by taking me directly into the second attention. He planned a series of bold actions that would galvanize my awareness.

For our first not-doing, Silvio Manuel constructed a wooden crate big enough to house la Gorda and me if we sat back-to-back with our knees up. The crate had a lid made of lattice-work to let in a flow of air.

La Gorda and I were to climb inside it and sit in total darkness and total silence without falling asleep. He began by letting us enter the box for short periods. Then he increased the time as we got used to the procedure until we could spend the entire night inside it without moving or dozing off.

The Nagual woman stayed with us to make sure that we would not change levels of awareness due to fatigue. Silvio Manuel said that our natural tendency under unusual conditions of stress is to shift from the heightened state of awareness to our normal one, and vice versa.

The general effect of the not-doing every time we performed it was to give us an unequalled sense of rest; which was a complete puzzle to me, since we never fell asleep during our nightlong vigils. I attributed the sense of rest to the fact that we were in a state of heightened awareness, but Silvio Manuel said that the one had nothing to do with the other; that the sense of rest was the result of sitting with our knees up.

The second not-doing consisted of making us lie on the ground like curled-up dogs, almost in the fetal position, resting on our left sides, our foreheads on our folded arms. Silvio Manuel insisted that we keep our eyes closed as long as possible, opening them only when he told us to shift positions and lie on our right sides.

He told us that the purpose of this not-doing was to allow our sense of hearing to separate from our sight. As before, he gradually increased the length of time until we could spend the entire night in auditory vigil.
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註冊時間: 2012-03-05, 16:23
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-48

文章SW » 2024-01-27, 17:25

繼續摘第三個不做練習。雖然這些不做是屬於潛獵的範圍,但因為卡氏和拉葛達都是做夢者,因此也是給予做夢者快速契入第二注意力的訓練。

第三個不做,令我想起小龍女,長期睡在一根繩子上。秋竹師說「空行母」或「空行」就叫「離地」:


空行就是一個總稱,不是一般的女人,比較有特異功能的女人叫做空行,她們離地嘛。中國叫離地行,比較文雅一點叫空行,白話一點叫離地行——鬼的意思嘛,對不對?那種鬼——就是空行,單單的空行就是這個意思。(秋竹仁波切,2012/05/31 施身法(空行吼嘯)-5)

所以使用吊床,應該也有異曲同工之妙吧。但睡吊床應該培養不出那種注意力,因為被吊就是要維持警醒,所以女nagual才要整夜叫他們名字不讓他們睡著。

有關樹的覺知,以前上過王靜蓉老師的靈氣課,練習中要去找一棵樹對話。其實生物都是有意識的,只是反應速度不一樣。但佛法不把植物當成有情,就是具有意識;我聽淨空法師講過,超過三十公分高以上的植物住有靈體,樹越大靈體越大,若要砍樹最好提前知會好讓他們搬家。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-48

然後西維歐‧曼紐耶隨後準備將我們轉移到另一個活動領域(area of activity)。他解釋說,在前兩個「不做」中,打破了某種當我們被困在地上時的感知障礙。

他以類比的方式,把人比喻成樹木。我們就像會動的樹。我們不知何故根植於地;我們的根是可以移動的,但這並不能讓我們脫離地面。

他說,為了建立平衡,我們必須懸浮於空中以進行第三個「不做」。當我們用皮製索具吊在一棵樹上,如果我們成功感通(channeling)我們的「意願」,我們就能以我們的「意願」創造出一個三角形,一個底座在地面、頂點在空中的三角形。西維歐‧曼紐耶認為,我們已經透過前兩個「不做」聚集了注意力,是故我們可以從一開始就完美地進行第三個「不做」。

一天晚上,他把拉葛達與我分別吊在兩個像網椅般的索具中。我們坐在裡面,然後他用滑輪把我們拉高到一棵大樹最高的大樹枝上。他要我們注意這棵樹的覺知(awareness),他說樹會給我們信號,因為我們是它的客人。他讓女Nagual整晚都待在地上,時不時地呼叫我們的名字。

當我們被吊在樹上進行這個「不做」不計其數時,我們體驗到身體有一股美妙的流動的感受,就像是電子脈衝輕微的電荷(充電)一樣。

在最初的三、四次嘗試時,這棵樹彷彿在抗議我們的入侵。之後,這種脈衝變成了寧靜與平衡的信號。

西維歐‧曼紐耶告訴我們,樹的覺知從大地深處吸取養分,而動物的覺識則從地表汲取營養。樹沒有爭鬥的感受,而動物卻全身上下充滿鬥志。

他的論點是,當在黑暗中處於寂靜狀態時,我們的感知會遭受深刻的震動。這時,我們的聽覺會占主導地位,來自我們周圍所有具生命及現存實體的信號都可以被偵測到──不是僅以我們的聽覺,而是聽覺與視覺的結合,以這樣的順序。他說,在黑暗中,尤其當一個人被懸吊時,眼睛變成從屬於耳朵。

正如拉葛達和我發現的那樣,他是絕對正確的。透過第三個「不做」的練習,西維歐‧曼紐耶為我們對周遭世界的感知賦予了一個新的層面。

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 270-271,重譯

Silvio Manuel was then ready to move us to another area of activity. He explained that in the first two not-doings we had broken a certain perceptual barrier while we were stuck to the ground.

By way of analogy, he compared human beings to trees. We are like mobile trees. We are somehow rooted to the ground. Our roots are transportable, but that does not free us from the ground.

He said that in order to establish balance we had to perform the third not-doing while dangling in the air. If we succeeded in channeling our intent while we were suspended from a tree inside a leather harness, we would make a triangle with our intent, a triangle whose base was on the ground and its vertex in the air. Silvio Manuel thought that we had gathered our attention with the first two not-doings to the point that we could perform the third perfectly from the beginning.

One night he suspended la Gorda and me in two separate harnesses like strap chairs. We sat in them and he lifted us with a pulley to the highest large branches of a tall tree. He wanted us to pay attention to the awareness of the tree which he said would give us signals since we were its guests. He made the Nagual woman stay on the ground and call our names from time to time during the entire night.

While we were suspended from the tree in the innumerable times we performed this not-doing, we experienced a glorious flood of physical sensations like mild charges of electrical impulses.

During the first three or four attempts, it had been as if the tree were protesting our intrusion. Then after that, the impulses became signals of peace and balance.

Silvio Manuel told us that the awareness of a tree draws its nourishment from the depths of the earth, while the awareness of mobile creatures draws it from the surface. There is no sense of strife in a tree, whereas moving beings are filled to the brim with it.

His contention was that perception suffers a profound jolt when we are placed in states of quietude in darkness. Our hearing takes the lead then, and the signals from all the living and existing entities around us can be detected- not with our hearing only, but with a combination of the auditory and visual senses, in that order. He said that in darkness, especially while one is suspended, the eyes become subsidiary to the ears.

He was absolutely right, as la Gorda and I discovered. Through the exercise of the third not-doing, Silvio Manuel gave a new dimension to our perception of the world around us.
SW
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文章: 4411
註冊時間: 2012-03-05, 16:23
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-49

文章SW » 2024-02-16, 18:28

這集主要是在講巫士的訓練,要從兩方面著手:一個是所謂右邊的教育,一個則是左邊的教育,二者不可偏廢。

這讓我想起金剛乘修學體系亦有講與修兩種:


什麼是「教證二法」(gtsug lag rnam gnyis)?指教法和證法,亦即講、修(bshad sgrub)二種;「講」指宣講、解釋,「修」指實修。對於初學者,許多寺院都設有講經院(collage of study)和修道院(collage of practice)兩種學院。(象雄文化,《覺性杜鵑》p. 104)

這個蘇麗卡,在卡氏女同儕小佛琳達自己的書 Being-in-Dreaming 中有較多的著墨,是個幾乎都處在做夢狀態的女巫士。她在日常世界的名字叫蘇麗卡,秘密名(做夢體的名字)則是 Esperanza。

其實修持密宗儀軌,無論是本尊還是修禪定,基本上也是要訓練不再處於一般意識狀態,如果修了半天還是在心識(第一注意力)的範圍中,等於沒什麼用。

所以這邊提到了洞穴,在另一本卡氏女同儕塔夏莎的《巫士的穿越》中,一開始她遇到唐望,也是在洞穴中待了好幾天,後來的訓練才是住樹屋。至於為什麼不能在水邊修,理由我也不清楚。

至於要在完全的黑暗中修,是否跟黑關類似,應該是不一樣的。因為這裡是修做夢,所以主要是先訓練醒夢不分,然後環境類似睡覺做夢的情況,讓做夢體起作用。當然粗略講起來,修 24hr 或更久的黑關,目的也是讓醒睡分不清楚,意識就可以一路貫穿醒夢,這對於一直無法有清明夢也就是作夢時的覺知是有幫助的。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-49

根據西維歐‧曼紐耶的總體計畫(master plan),對我來說有兩種指導:一種針對右邊〔意識〕,另一種則針對左邊。

右邊的指導適用於普通(日常)意識,並與引導我在理性上相信人類身上隱藏著另一種類型的意識有關。唐望負責此一指導。

左邊的指導被指派給蘇麗卡(Zuleica)。其與強化意識有關,並完全與第二注意力的控制有關。

因此,每次我去墨西哥,我都會花一半的時間和蘇麗卡在一起,另一半的時間和唐望在一起。

According to Silvio Manuel's master plan there were to be two kinds of instruction for me, one for the right side and one for the left.

The right side instruction pertained to the state of normal consciousness and had to do with leading me to the rational conviction that there is another type of awareness concealed in human beings. Don Juan was in charge of this instruction.

The left side instruction had been assigned to Zuleica. It was related to the state of heightened awareness, and had to do exclusively with the handling of the second attention.

Thus every time I went to Mexico I would spend half of my time with Zuleica, and the other half with don Juan.

****

蘇麗卡很有效地引導我進入第二注意力。她堅持我們的互動只能在晚上進行,而且是在完全的黑暗中。對我來說,蘇麗卡只是黑暗中的一個聲音;每次我們接觸時,聲音都會告訴我要把注意力集中在她的話上,別無其他。她的聲音就是拉葛達以為她在「做夢」中聽見的那個女人的聲音。

蘇麗卡告訴我,如果要在室內「做夢」,最好是在完全黑暗的情況下,躺或坐在一張窄床上;或者更好的是,坐在一個像棺材的木箱內。她認為在戶外「做夢」,就要在一個洞穴的保護下,在水洞的沙質地帶,或在山中背靠岩石坐著;切勿在峽谷的平地上,或靠近河流、湖泊,或海洋;因為平地和水都對第二注意力不利(與第二注意力相對立)。

我與她的每一次會面都充滿著神秘的色彩。她解釋說,直接激發第二注意力最可靠的方法,就是透過儀式行為:單調的唱誦;複雜的重複動作。

她的教導並不是關於「做夢」的前行,那些唐望已經教過我了。她的假設是,無論誰來找她,都已經知道如何「做夢」了;所以她專門處理左邊意識的深奧要點。

Zuleica was very effective as my guide into the second attention. She insisted that our interaction take place only at night, and in total darkness. For me, Zuleica was only a voice in the dark; a voice that started every contact we had by telling me to focus my attention on her words and nothing else. Her voice was the woman's voice that la Gorda thought she had heard in dreaming.

Zuleica told me that if dreaming is going to be done indoors, it is best to do it in total darkness, while lying down or sitting up on a narrow bed; or better yet, while sitting inside a coffin-like crib. She thought that outdoors, dreaming should be done in the protection of a cave, in the sandy areas of water holes, or sitting against a rock in the mountains; never on the flat floor of a valley, or next to rivers, or lakes, or the sea; because flat areas as well as water were antithetical to the second attention.

Every one of my sessions with her was imbued with mysterious overtones. She explained that the surest way to make a direct hit on the second attention is through ritual acts: monotonous chanting; intricate repetitious movements.

Her teachings were not about the preliminaries of dreaming which had already been taught to me by don Juan. Her assumption was that whoever came to her already knew how to do dreaming; so she dealt exclusively with esoteric points of the left side awareness.

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 281, 285-286,重譯
SW
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註冊時間: 2012-03-05, 16:23
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「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-50

文章SW » 2024-03-09, 17:35

這一集比較長些,主要是講到唐望巫士的「類黑關」訓練。我們知道藏傳寧瑪派的「妥噶」和「央提」修法,後者主要就是閉黑關,二者都有在黑暗中利用自己能量顯現出可以目擊的明點,再將自己四大組合之肉身融入明點,以證得虹光身。

而唐望巫士,特別是做夢者,則是利用在黑暗中凝視,先是現前一塊色斑(有顏色的斑點,可能形狀一開始並不明確),慢慢變成形狀明確非常明亮的斑點,直到自己進入到這個強烈明點當中。(在秋竹法王的法本當中,明點常譯為斑點,如〈龍欽心要斑點法門〉。)

這裡提到靜態守夜,我們可以往前回顧一下:靜態守夜時會經歷一片紅光(可能類似「明、增、得」的增相階段),我們可以在下一個「動態守夜」及之後的階段時現前夢的畫面,然後自己由其進入夢當中,可以說這些都可以是一種通道。(事實上我覺得,靜態守夜、動態守夜、被動目擊、主動參與,這四種狀態都可以擔任通道一職;就好像中陰教法中的五個融入階段,任一都可以是解脫的通道。)

這篇同時描述了小姐妹們的訓練過程,其中約瑟芬娜跟卡斯塔尼達都成功進入橘紅色斑點中。直到最後卡氏睜開眼睛,終於見到身為做夢體的蘇麗卡,不然在現實世界,她永遠只是個聲音,不具物質實體。

因此這裡可以假設卡氏也連人帶身體都轉變成了做夢體,跟約瑟芬娜一樣,在物質世界的那個大廳裡消失了。如此,將這個橘紅色明點視為一種通道,也是非常合理的;正如卡氏自己的體悟,一直待在通道裡也沒什麼用處。


「唐望故事」做夢篇 REVIEW-50

蘇麗卡引我到她屋子最黑暗的廳裡的一處壁龕。儘管我的眼睛已經適應了黑暗,但我還是什麼也看不見。她命令我坐進一個狹窄的木條箱中,用一個我認為是硬的墊子支撐我的下背。

接下來我感覺她在我身後往後退了幾步;這件事使我完全懵了,因為我以為我的背離牆壁只有幾英吋。她在我身後輕聲命我集中注意力,讓她的話來領導我。她叫我睜開眼睛,注視著面前與我視線齊平的一點(a point);而這一點將從黑暗變成明亮宜人的橘紅色。

我周圍的黑暗似乎有效地隔絕了任何令人分心的外在干擾。我在一種真空中聽著蘇麗卡的話,然後我意識到在那廳裡的寂靜與我內在的寂靜相配合。

蘇麗卡解釋說,做夢者必須從一個色點(a point of color)開始。另一方面,像是紫色、淺綠色或豔黃色等,都是絕佳的起點。

然而,她更偏愛橘紅色,因為根據經驗,那個顏色能給她最大的放鬆感。她向我保證,一旦我成功進入橘紅色中,我就會永遠聚集了我的第二注意力——前提是我能夠覺知到物理事件〔發生〕的順序。

****
拉葛達說,她和約瑟芬娜住在蘇麗卡的屋子好幾個月。她們坐在那裏直到天黑。然後蘇麗卡來到她們身邊。她們從未見過她:她們只聽到她的聲音,就好像她是從牆上的一個點在對她們說話一樣。

蘇麗卡從接手那一刻起就非常嚴格。接下來,她命令她們背對背坐在我自己曾坐過的同一個壁龕的墊子上。蘇麗卡告訴她們,她們的任務是去凝視黑暗,直到它開始具有一種色調。經過多次的會面後,她們真的開始在黑暗中看見顏色。

拉葛達說,約瑟芬娜學得很快,有一天晚上,她從斗蓬中甩出身體,戲劇性地進入了那個橘紅色斑點(patch)中。拉葛達認為,不是約瑟芬娜伸手抓住那個色斑(blotch),就是那個色斑抓住她了。結果就是一瞬間約瑟芬娜就從斗蓬中消失了。(譯按:patch和blotch都有斑點的意思。)

種種跡象顯示,蘇麗卡引導我經歷了她引導拉葛達與約瑟芬娜的同樣步驟。在許多次會面過程中,我一直盯著黑暗,並準備好看到著色的那一點。事實上,我目睹了它從單純的黑暗轉變為輪廓明確的強烈明亮斑點的整個過程。

首先,我被外部的搔癢所牽動。然後我將注意力集中在它上面,直到我最終進入一種「靜態守夜」的狀態。就在那時,我第一次沉浸在一種橘紅的色彩中。

有一次當我處於「靜態守夜」時,我瞭解到留在那種狀態是沒有用的。然後我感到身體一陣顫抖,我睜開眼睛,或者更正確地說是我的眼睛自己睜開的。蘇麗卡正盯著我看。我感到一陣困惑。我以為我已經醒了,而與活生生的蘇麗卡面對面是我始料未及的,我習慣了只聽到她的聲音。讓我驚訝的是,現在也不是晚上。我環顧四周。我們並不在蘇麗卡的屋子裡。然後一意識到我是在做夢,我就醒了。

《老鷹的贈予》pp. 286-287, 290-292,重譯

She led me to an alcove in the darkest hall in her house. Although my eyes were used to the darkness I was still unable to see a thing. She commanded me to sit down inside a narrow crib and support my lower back with something I thought was a hard cushion.

I next felt that she had backed up a few steps behind me; a thing which baffled me completely because I thought that my back was only a few inches from the wall. Speaking from behind me, she ordered me in a soft voice to focus my attention on her words and let them guide me. She told me to keep my eyes open and fixed on a point right in front of me at my eye level; and that this point was going to turn from darkness to a bright and pleasing orange-red.

The darkness around me seemed to have effectively cut off any distracting external stimuli. I heard Zuleica's words in a vacuum, and then I realized that the silence in that hall was matched by the silence inside me.

Zuleica explained that a dreamer must start from a point of color. Colors such as purple or light green or rich yellow are, on the other hand, stupendous starting points.

She preferred, however, orange-red, because through experience it had proven to be the one that gave her the greatest sensation of rest. She assured me that once I had succeeded in entering into the orange-red color I would have rallied my second attention permanently- providing that I could be aware of the sequence of physical events.

****
La Gorda said that she and Josefina lived in Zuleica's house for several months. They sat there until it got dark. Zuleica then came to them. They never saw her: They only heard her voice as if she were talking to them from a point on the wall.

Zuleica was very demanding from the moment she took over. Next, she ordered them to sit back to back on a mat in the same alcove where I myself used to sit. Zuleica told them that their task was to gaze at the darkness until it began to acquire a hue. After many sessions they indeed began to see colors in the darkness.

La Gorda said that Josefina learned very fast, and that one night she dramatically entered into the patch of orange-red by swishing physically out of the poncho. La Gorda thought that either Josefina had reached out for the blotch of color or it had reached out for her. The result was that in one instant Josefina was gone from inside the poncho.

By all indications, Zuleica had lead me through the same steps she had led la Gorda and Josefina.

I had stared at the darkness throughout many sessions, and was ready to visualize the spot of coloration. In fact, I witnessed its entire metamorphosis from plain darkness to a precisely outlined blotch of intense brightness.

First I was swayed by the external itch. I then focused my attention upon it until I ended up entering into a state of restful vigil. It was then that I first became immersed in an orange-red coloration.

While I was in the state of restful vigil, I realized one time that it was useless for me to remain there. I sensed then a tremor in my body and I opened my eyes, or rather my eyes became open by themselves. Zuleica was staring at me. I experienced a moment of bafflement. I thought I had woken up, and to be faced with Zuleica in the flesh was something I had not expected. I had gotten used to hearing only her voice. It also surprised me that it was no longer night. I looked around. We were not in Zuleica's house. Then the realization struck me that I was dreaming and I woke up.
SW
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文章: 4411
註冊時間: 2012-03-05, 16:23
來自: 台灣台北

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